Monday, November 25, 2013

Wounded Space

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Have you ever wondered which hurts most?
Saying something and wishing you had not,
or not saying anything and wish you had?


The ticking times I've spent with countless of what-ifs and fear diluted into a pot of bravery, 
in which I'm betting a whole chunk of my heart. 


The thought of spending my life pretending his heart meant nothing for me
was even more frightening than the possibility of getting my heart crushed,
so then I gamble my heart for the sake of his.


Be it a bad luck or a fate,
all that I know that I was sure that I love everything about him and us, 
even parts that I might not understand.


Now I've got to pick up the shattered pieces of my heart. 

Saturday, November 2, 2013

In The Blink of An Eye


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To her, he was beautiful.
But it was hidden behind an invisible wall.

A wall that not everyone know is there.

Behind it there's a heart she'd embrace and say
"Hey, I care, I carry so much of you in my heart. You are loved."

Feelings turned into written words.
A draft full of honest thoughts.

She buries her ears into the calm of his heartbeat,
but she couldn't hear a thing.
She realised that the wall was too high.
The wall that was made out of consciousness,
a decision of one part.

Questioning, in pain, and barely understand how could two people who used to share both their happiness & fear, are now being pushed by an invisible wall between them.

From being big part of each other's life, now the wall's putting them back into strangers for one another.

Coming to a realisation that loving someone requires a leap of faith,
and that a soft landing is never guaranteed,
she has now realised that the landing costs her her feelings.